My Journey of Finding a “Home” Online as a Surface Pattern Designer

When I first started in surface pattern design, everyone around me said the same thing: “You need a website. You need a portfolio so that art directors can see your work and collaborate with you.”

Like many beginners, I dreamed of working with big brands and seeing my patterns on their products. That dream led me to my very first “home” online—Squarespace.

From Squarespace to Shopify: Chasing a New Goal

Squarespace felt like a natural first step. Many experienced surface pattern designers I admired used it, and I wanted to follow in their footsteps. It was perfect for showcasing a clean portfolio.

But after a year, my goals began to change. I no longer just wanted to show my work—I wanted to sell my patterns directly online. That’s when I moved to Shopify. At the time, its e-commerce fees were cheaper than Squarespace, and it seemed like the perfect solution for opening my own shop.

Unfortunately, I quickly learned a hard lesson: running a shop is not just about opening the door. I didn’t have enough time to create and update new products consistently. Month after month, I paid nearly €40, and after more than a year, I still hadn’t sold a single pattern on my own website.

Over time, I also realized that I cared more about sharing blog posts and building a space for connection than running a full e-commerce shop. Keeping Shopify for that purpose felt too expensive, so I made the decision to return to Squarespace, which offered a plan that matched my new goals better.

What I Learned About Selling Patterns

Through this failure, I realized something important: having a popular marketplace matters. Platforms like Patternbank or Creative Market already have an audience looking for patterns. Selling on your own website, on the other hand, requires more than just uploading products—you need to understand taxes, run ads, and constantly drive traffic.

To be fair, Shopify did have features I loved: custom domain emails, free email marketing, and I even managed to collect hundreds of subscribers. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that many of those subscribers weren’t truly interested in my journey. It started to feel wasteful, both in terms of money and energy.

Returning to Squarespace: A True Home

That’s why I decided to cut costs and return to Squarespace, this time with a different purpose. Instead of chasing sales or big collaborations, I want my website to be my real home—a place to share my thoughts, blog posts, and new designs.

In the beginning, I placed too much focus on Instagram, always hoping for more followers and playing the algorithm. After years of trying (and even “winning” sometimes), I realized it meant nothing. What matters to me now is connecting with people who genuinely care about my journey—not just numbers on a screen.

That’s why from now on, I’ll focus more on my personal blog. I won’t chase emails or try to build a giant subscriber list. But if you find something meaningful here, if a post touches you, I’d love for you to reach out through my contact page.

Letting Go of the Big Brand Dream

I no longer dream of working with big brands. I’ve come to understand my own value—and I believe if I ever do connect with a brand, it will happen naturally. Some things are simply destined, and you can’t force them.

I work as a freedom designer, following my own ideals. And I feel deeply grateful—for the designers I’ve learned from through their blogs and posts on Pinterest and Instagram, and for the customers who have trusted me enough to buy my designs.

When the time is right, when the connection is meant to be, my patterns will find their way into someone’s home. That, to me, is the real gift of this journey.

Conclusion

Over the years, I’ve learned that social media is borrowed space. Algorithms rise and fall, platforms shift, and followers can vanish overnight. For a long time, I chased those numbers, thinking they defined my progress. But they never truly belonged to me.

A website, however, is different. It’s a place you own, a space no algorithm can take away. It grows with you, reflects your values, and becomes the archive of your creative journey. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve carried with me: while social media might give you visibility, your website gives you permanence.

✨ Trends fade, algorithms shift. But my website remains my anchor, the real home for my creative journey.